Anger

It rushes in plowing through everything not caring who is effects or what it does
it makes ou feel like you are choking dying inside
it makes the world seem like it is crushing you
it colors everything red and black and purple and yellow and green like one massive bruise

PAIN

PAIN

Pain is that thing that we perceive as bad

it often seems to have a life of it's own leeching the life from us

it tells us that something bad is going on but without pain we would not know the good in life without the pain of childbirth we would not know the joy of having a child without the pain that comes with aging we would not really be able to look at life through the eyes of our grandchildrenwithout the pain of loosing a parent or spouse we would not think back on the joys in our lives nor would we pass it on to our grandchildren as the joy of our grandparents was passed to us. Though the pain may occasionally get me down and make me want to cry I say bring it on because of the joys it reminds me of.

Changes

so I have been toying with this story that started as a dream.                                                                                                                            Changes

It all started with a bright greenish flash seen world wide followed by three day aurora borealis event also seen worldwide which started on the side of the planet away from the sun. Many people in third world countries were so terrified that they killed their whole families and committed suicide of course so did some of the extremely religious in non third world countries. During the time of the aurora event a few other strange things happened, first slowly over the three days the power went out world wide. Nothing that creates power would work not solar panels not generators nothing, even batteries would not work after those three days. We heard stories from people passing through going to the city about how there was no military any more how they had all deserted to be with their families, there were stories about how people were fighting for food, medical supplies, even water, stores were raided for everything. Living in the country the way we did most of those were not a problem for us.

The Attack

This is a dream I had
I was helping a friend with a yard sale when someone stole a ice chest  I chased after the woman knowing that the meat in the in the cooler was bad I was trying to save her and anyone she  would give it to when these 4 women attacked me. after trying to fight them off I called upon two of my gods and one of my goddess' they came to me and took me over and fought through me saving me and allowing me to catch the woman before she could give the meat to other people. she screamed at me about how I chased her just because she took the cooler and a little meat I said to her "you know you really are stupid this meat is bad it was in the cooler to be thrown away anyone who ate this would get sick and probably die I didn't chase you for the stupid cooler I was trying to save your life and the lives anyone you gave it to you can keep the stupid cooler"
The Gods I called upon were
Odin to bring knowledge to the stupid lady
Thor because I was fighting a righteous battle
and
Freya the warrior Goddess and head Valkyrie

SILENT SCREAM

I sit here wondering if the sanity will ever return.
Yelling screaming but not a sound made.
I know I hear it does anyone else.
Ok maybe they don't hear it but they must feel it and what it does.
Tension, anxiety, stress, this is killing us all.
Can we fix it, should we fix it, is there a fix for it, I don't know,
all I do know is if it does not end I will have to leave.
Why because it is killing me with higher blood glucose numbers and higher blood pressure, I am having to take more anxiety meds. That is not good for anyone.  

INSOMNIA

It's 5:30 AM and once again I can not sleep. Laying in the dark silence waiting for my brain to quit going and for sleep to come.When will sleep come I wish I knew when it would happen.

Last Gasp

It started in the night with no warning, to us anyway.

We awoke to a world of white in almost white out conditions.

The world once more silent and cold.

The wet blanket lay heavy upon our world, the wet white falling so fast and thick 

at times it seemed as if we were the only ones left.

I look out today and wonder how the branches could survive with such heavy coatings on them, they lay against the trees almost pointing to the ground and yet they stay covered in the wet cold snow.

 I hope this is the last gasp of winter.